If you have a dog that can speak, get them to give me a call ASAP!
We will put you in touch with an agent who will arrange for your verbose canine chum to appear on a certain live TV show that started last night. (Nope - sadly you don't need to go to Australia, if there was 1st class travel thrown in I'd have concealed a tape recorder in Oscar's coat and applied myself!)
No, dogs are not going to replace Ant and Dec - even though budgets appear to be being chopped if the stories about the celebs' fees are correct.
First choice is a dog that can say "Sausages" - but in reality the ability to say anything at all will be greatly appreciated.
Please get in touch ASAP and I will unite you with the man who can make your dog a star!
Some remuneration is highly likely for the right candidate.
But hurry, if you've not yet trained your dog to speak - you'll need to be quick!
The show is only on TV for three weeks!